Montreal moved into your brain years ago and never signed the lease, but you’re stuck with it. It rearranged the furniture, made some questionable renovations, and it's there for good now—all the grudges, the guilty habits, and the opinions you'd defend with your life.
Below, 39 pieces of evidence. Count how many apply, but keep the number to yourself. Bisous.
1. You get a visit from the Office québécois de la langue française for writing "Nosh" on your banner, but your neighbours Burger King and Starbucks can sleep easy.
2. You've genuinely considered climbing Saint Joseph's Oratory on your knees to atone for your sins.
3. You remember when, in the 1990s, a visit to Jarry Park was synonymous with a tetanus infection.
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